Pregnancy…reality check

Yep, that’s right I need to write myself a slight reality check.

 

 

I LOVED being pregnant, after the initial morning sickness / nausea’s feelings passed it was just the most amazing experience of my life.  Growing a person, 10 toes, 10 fingers…you know the drill but when you think, and I mean really think about it for 9 months out babies grew (like little parasites I was once heard to say) from cells to tiny beings, their hearts beating inside us.  Just amazing, and I don’t care how corny it sounds it truly is a miraculous and incredible experience.

However, to stop me getting broody (or just help to remove those rose-tinted glasses) and inspired by the wonderful Hannah @ make, Do and push! who wrote this wonderful post I am writing a list of things that did really annoy me about being knocked up!

1. Booze. Or lack there of…in summer it means no large glass of chilled wine or no huge jug of pimms and a straw. Winter, no full and ripe red wines, mulled wine or copious amounts of bubbly come the festive season. Also means no beer (or five) with a curry or mexican.  Obviously you can partake in the odd glass, but me I wasn’t willing to risk it. Meaning after what feels like being pregnant forever means my hard earned drinking abilities are gone, and I’m left tipsy or with a headache after just half a beer or glass of wine. Gah.
2. Designated driver. Yep, because of above. Thanks. Again.
3. Cheese!! Amongst other things, yes pate and Rare steaks I’m talking about you. Never before have I craved pate or stinky moldy cheese so much.  Luckily I moaned so much about it when I was preggers I was lucky enough to receive copious amounts of both…yaye!
4. Maintenance. Ok, not for the first few months but by the time 6/7 months comes around unless you have a well behaved (!) other half bye toenails see you when the baby is, hmmmm 1 year old and I have some time  to paint you.  And the lady garden…seriously neglected, again unless you TRUST your other half to behave it’s kind of a no go (self maintenance wise anyway) I did have an immac related disasster…but we won’t go there 😉
5. Maternity Clothes. Er highstreet…sort it out. Please. I loved ASOS’s maternity range but found the highstreet sorely lacking and all that was there was majorly overpriced in my opinion.  That and the fact that I’m tall really made shopping fun.
6. Sense of smell / taste. Mine went into overdrive, things that I normally loved made me have severe gag reflex and near vomiting experiences, for example; Rotisseri chickens in supermarkets, generally a good smell, first pregnancy I couldn’t go anywhere near the part of the shop with them in without dry heaving, no joke, my Mum found this hilarious when shopping with me. Second time round it was mushrooms. Yep, seriously just the though of them had me yacking, couldn’t go near them in the veg aisle, wouldn’t have them in the house and if my long suffering husband even suggested them for dinner I would heave in his face (involuntarily I might add!! Why? No idea and neither of them bother me now at all. (thankfully)
7. Cuddles. Or lack there of, again this is a 3rd trimester thing but I was so all out front with both of mine that cuddles were a no go, even with Bean!!!
8. Sleep. Pregnancy insomnia. CHECK. Leg cramps whilst sleeping. CHECK. Needing to pee 45 billion times a night. CHECK. Not being able to get comfy. CHECK. I love to lie on my tummy to sleep, obviously with one in the oven, that ain’t happening, so my nighttime fidgets got worse and worse. On several occasions I made my hubby sleep at the bottom of our bed instead of the top as I was adamant it was more comfortable. (like I said, long suffering!!)
9. Chivalry. And no, I’m not talking about giving up seats, I mean the well meaning people who think pregnancy is some kind of illness leaving you incapable of many of life’s day to day going’s on.  I may sound a little rude, but as someone who is ridiculously independent this did not go down well with me. No pleasing some people.
10. Baby Movements. WAIT, don’t shoot me yet. Yes, the majority of them I loved but the ones where it looked like my precious passenger was trying to escape via my belly button…not so much. Alien like to say the least.
11. Hormones. Specifically making me cry.  Before I knew I was pregnant second time round I could not stop crying at the news Whitney Houston had passed away, don’t get me wrong she was a very talented lady but I never knew I liked her that much, I am serious when I say I could not stop crying it was awful…and then I found out I was pregnant, now I get it!
12. And the brucey bonus…My belly button. I have an outy, so as you are no doubt aware pregnancy made it a literal button for the world to see, didn’t bother me in the least (amused me greatly if I am perfectly honest) but when people tried to push it!!! No no no no no. 10 times worse than random people touching your belly. ewww.

There won’t be a corresponding things I loved post because there were hundreds of them and I would be pregnant again in no time.

Birth Story Second Time Round – Part 2

I think I was still in denial at this point, scared that if I acknowledged it I would scare it away.  So we got home and I sat bouncing on my ball whilst Hubby sorted Beans dinner and got her all tucked up in bed, whilst I, bored with bouncing got on with making dinner.

We watched a movie with dinner, what I cannot remember all I remember was eating through my contractions enjoying my Mexican food but not quite sure if it was the best choice as we all know sometimes you gotta go during labour. Ah well!  I had started to feel pretty uncomfortable by this point so at my husbands suggestion I took a bath, hubby sitting with me whipped out the iPhone to time my contractions (yes, they’ve got an app for that) they were coming 5/6 minutes apart, I got out and wanted to double-check my bag and by this point I was not comfortable at all, so hubby phoned the hospital (8pm ish?) who spoke to me and said I had to be having 3 in 10 minutes to warrant going in…eekkk.  I was not looking forward to this no and was maybe starting to regret being so adamant to not having  section!

In Labour…

I was starting to get a little short with my Husband by this point, as I think you do when you are trying to deal with quite a remarkable amount of pain only to have someone tell you to relax between contractions – THERE IS NO BETWEEN CONTRACTIONS!!! So I was pretty much in an oversized t-shirt (although it was pretty damned cold out, hubby was actually under the duvet) whilst I crawled about on all 4’s the only way I actually felt comfortable.  The pressure was getting unbearable now, but every time my hubby wanted to phone the hospital again I wouldn’t let him, still certain I would only be 3/4 cms and be sent home.  Then they went of the chart, and it seemed to be a constant stream of OWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!  He phoned the hospital and told them we were coming and then phoned my Mum, I think it was 10.30 at this point.  Now, bearing in mind my Mum is never late for anything, in fact she’s always early and she knew I was in labour she and my stepdad took literally forever to get to our house 2 minutes away (literally 2 minutes) So when they finally arrived at 11pm I was not a happy bunny and as soon as I saw their faces, wide-eyed with fear I knew I couldn’t shout at them! So I hugged them as fast and calmly as I could without (I hope) showing too much pain on my face, before bundling into the back on my car in all fours riding out the contractions.

The one thing I had asked my hubby not to do was when I’m in labour – do not ask me the way to go to hospital. And he did, needless to say I ignored him..! It was the longest 15 minutes of my life driving to the hospital and all I was hoping was not be sent home!  I had the urge to stop so many times walking from the car park to A&E but I was so desperate to get to the ward, the reception staff just saw my face and pointed the way, and guess what – no lift, stairs. now those I couldn’t master without stopping!!

Once we got onto the Delivery Suite I could hear in the nurses voices that they thought I was another first timer struggling a bit, so off we went to triage, I was so hot that my trousers were off again and then I needed to pee, the midwife was clearly not impressed with me so far!  So, the dreaded examination came next and to my utter joy I was 7/8 cms (seriously I was so pleased, I have no idea what I would have done if they had said I was less than that coz it was getting unbearable by this point)  Their attitude to me changed immediately and despite thinking I wanted to use the pool, I was not interested by this point wandering down the corridor in my t-shirt, socks and pants, midwife & hubby behind lugging my gear – what I sight I must have been!!

So we got to the room, and I was straight on the floor again, it was more comfortable and sooooo cold!  Now, because I was classed as high risk owing to the previous section the first things they had to do was get a ‘line’ in my arm and get the monitors on the baby so they could check the heart rate at all times, me being me this was not as easy as it sounds.  I’m on all fours when they give me the gas and air, and I hit that biatch HARD, whilst two nurses tried to get this needle in my arm…I may have taken a little too much gas as the next thing I know I am passing out (hahahaha ROCKSTAR!!!) the nurses didn’t notice but hubby did so cue him trying to support me and keep  my arm straight so this needle would go in. Blood bath, s’all I’m saying!  Once I came round (not once did I let go of that gas during this) I  ended up kneeling on the semi dismantled bed from the floor up, at some point I realised I was still ridiculously hot I looked down to see myself wearing my socks “WHY THE FUCK AM I WEARING SOCKS?!? GERROMEOFFAME!!!” “But you love socks” was my hubby’s reply as he removed the offending items, now the midwife was getting a bit frustrated because she was desperately trying to monitor the baby and the leads wouldnt reach me on the floor, so up I climbed (like a mad woman possessed) onto the bed so that I was now kneeling holding onto the headboard as it were, with the monitors finally reaching my belly.  Not that it was any easier for the poor woman, afterwards she told me she had never in all her years of midwifery had a lady move and fidget as much as me. Active Birth and then some!!

So I was blissfully (!) riding out my contractions when all of a sudden there was this god awful surge of pressure and then a huge popping release “WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING?” Evidently I swear a lot, but it was my waters breaking, the midwife thought she saw meconium and that stopped me fidgeting long enough to be checked and actually it wasnt and we were fine, so off I went into my own little world battling through the contractions until that infamous “I need to poo” moment and before the midwife could get her gloves on to check I was 10cms I just started pushing, and when the midwife did check she announced that she could see lots of hair and for me to carry on pushing.

Now I am the first to admit that I am pretty impatient so after two or three goes I demanded to know what was taking so long, I was informed that I needed to be getting three good pushes for every contractions – only need to be told once so off I went on a mission, still it was taking to long, again I was told it was normal and the baby was just slipping back and forth.  I was not having this any longer so I pushed until I could push no more and I was finally initiated into that womans only club – The ring of fire, holy fuck that hurts.  That for me was the worst bit, i had abandoned the gas and air when I started pushing so to have to wait for the next contraction before I could push again was by far the worst bit and then before I knew it my darling girl was passed up between my legs towards my chest and my very confused face, hubby was crying the midwife was clucking away and all I was thinking was “Arrggghhh you’re here! How do I hold you again?!”  Daddy cut the cord and was positively beaming at our little bundle.  I was till numb to it all then, amazed that I had done it and she was finally here at 1.42am.

I was covered in all kinds of god knows what and then I had to sit in it, only to be informed that I had in fact torn and needed stitches. yaye. Then comes that good old giant needle filled with anesthetic and you know where its going, seriously after everything it’s just been through?! I could not be arsed with gas this time just get it in and get stitching.  Daddy was trying to remember how to get a newborn baby dressed whilst this was going on, and she was bigger than we had expected so the first outfit had to be swapped for another! Not funny for Daddy.  And then I got her back for that lovely first feed, the midwife went off to organise the awful tea (take your own bags, seriously it’s terrible) and toast.  I was done now, I wanted to get the hell outta hospital and home, I let the midwife know but I still had to wait until 7am until we could leave. Maccy D’s for bacon rolls and hot chocolate (and something for the grandparents waiting at home) whilst our precious little cargo slumbered peacefully in her seat.

It was such a nicer experience than first time round, yes it hurt but afterwards when we were left just the three of us we sat and talked the whole thing through, my husband calling me a machine and telling me how funny I had been (pain clearly bringing out the best in my dry humour) I had been so hot during the whole thing and normally I am freezing, I had demanded the fan be blowing in my face throughout and whenever it stopped I just kept asking my husband why he was turning it off, what I had missed was the fact that the midwife was telling him to turn it off as it couldn’t be on when the baby was born.  Clearly he knew who to listen to as that fan stayed on!!  We laughed a lot, and tried to fix on a name for baby girl number two it seemed to take us forever. Oh and she cried the whole time I was in the shower! Bless.  We also laughed at my husband getting very carried away with the contraction timing, at some point he decided that his job was way more important and got VERY cross with me for not letting him know when a contraction had started or ended.  It wasn’t funny at the time, I actually wanted to stab him with a butter knife, not that I had it about me to actually go and get one, but you get the drift, yet afterwards it just kept making me laugh, that and the sock incident!

We had only stepped back into our home for a few minutes when snow started falling, it only lasted minutes, but still.

Still the only picture of me and Bites that I like

Me, Bites, blood and the awful tea!

Looking back

So a new year has begun.

2012 was the year I got to become a mummy again. I’m not going to lie, it was tough. A much tougher pregnancy, and I was extremely hard on myself, beating myself up a lot of the time because I was just too tired or too uncomfortable to function as I wanted to. I felt like I wasn’t being a good enough Mum to Bean because I couldn’t play with her properly, Jeez by July I couldn’t bath or lift her in or out of her cot comfortably let alone cuddle her as Bites was transverse. It was heart breaking for me and I felt if I spoke to anyone about it they would laugh at me, or think it was trivial, but it really upset me.

In the end, I got to have my natural birth 🙂

I turned 28 and had yet another birthday sober – no more I tell you.  And I got my hair chopped off.

Me and Bean on my birthday

I celebrated my first wedding anniversary, planned by my amazing husband and was a complete surprise – The Hand & Flowers, the food was amazing!  I can’t wait to go back again and get my fois gras on (I was preggers and therefore only had the tiniest of tastes..!)

Dodgy iPhone pic of the Fois Gras

Raspberry Souffle. Ahhh yeh

Builders Tea – yes please.

I cooked a lot, tried new recipes and got my bake on, I’m hoping to expand on this in 2013.

I realised that being a Mum is by far the most incredible, terrifying, fun and exhausting thing I have ever undertaken and I love it more and more everyday.  Except for the days when they both need to cry all day for no unfathomable reason, well to me anyway.  And along with that realisation came the thought that I am proud of being a mum, and that is something I never ever thought I would feel.

I’m looking forward to seeing what this year has to bring, hopefully no pregnancies!!

 

Birth Story – Second time round

Late late late.

3 days late…

After everyone and his wife being adamant I would be having baby number two early, she was late. Bag on a week late as it goes, but that’s besides the point. If you’ve ever been pregnant the second your due day arrives you want that baby out, partially because you’ve waited long enough to meet them, partially because you’re so fringing uncomfortable but mainly because every other person you know is incapable of not asking you if you’ve had it yet….yes yes, that’s why I’m still waddling around with a beach ball stuffed up my top. Nothing.More.Annoying.

I digress (being a Mother means I’m prone to a random ramble, but bear with me) Bean was born by c-section and I was adamant I wasn’t going to have another one, my Lil girl had other ideas as she spent most of the pregnancy in the transverse (across me, rather than head or bum down) which was pretty uncomfortable and then at my 36 week midwives appointment she was sure baby was the right way. I was shocked, I thought I was incapable of carrying a baby the right way up! I saw my consultant a week later and was thrilled to hear that I wouldn’t have to have another section even if I went over they would induce me AND I could still have the water birth I’d originally wanted. But then I went a week over, saw the consultant again he’d decided to change his mind and started to book me in for a section. I almost burst into tears, I asked for a sweep which I was given and told I was 1.5cm dilated with a soft cervix, I then sat about waiting for around two hours whilst my pre-op was done (my cesarean was booked for 5 days time all that time I was getting period cramps, I tried not to think about it too much as I didn’t want to scare it away incase it was the real thing and I didn’t want to get my hopes up.

I spent a pretty sleepless night tossing and turning and having sporadic contractions, I didn’t tell my husband in the morning because I still didn’t quite believe it was happening so off he went to work…oblivious! I walked the dogs with my Mum and Bean contracting all the while, phoned my midwives office to get an appointment to beg for another sweep and get some help getting out of having a section! They begrudgingly agreed to see me, and I got my second sweep…now that bad boy was really uncomfortable, presumably because I was having contractions. The midwife was lovely though and although she could do nothing to stop the impending cesarean she told me to get myself onto that labour ward anyway I could as they were more likely to induce me if they thought something was wrong / happening.

So, I went and picked up Bean (my brother watched her for me as she freaked out at when drs or midwives touched me in previous appointments so I thought it was best not to take her to this one) at this point I was getting pains 3 or 4 times in a half hour period and they were pretty intense, so we went home and napped, well I tried!! I phoned the hubby asking him to be home by 3pm as that’s when bean usually woke up and I didn’t want to be on my own with her all afternoon having these pains. I was still convinced I wasnt in labour at this point because I couldn’t see my stomach tightening and that’s all I remember being told about real contractions, so I was merrily bouncing on my ball with bean when my man arrived home, he asked what I wanted to do and me being me I couldn’t just sit around waiting so I decided a trip to our local Tesco MEGAstore was a good idea, besides i fancied mexican food for dinner! So off we went, we’d been pottering around Tesco and the neighbouring M&S for an hour or so when my contractions started to take my breath away so we headed home…

Happy with what you got

I’ve been thinking a lot lately.

I read a lot of h-mazing and inspiring blogs, and you can’t help but aspire to be more like the wonderful women who write them, to envy their style be that homes, fashion or just general ” oh my god their lifestyle is awesome” it’s not different I suppose to people who read magazines and see the images of celebs and the likes and try to be more like them, or live that rockstar lifestyle.
Even though you know deep down its not always as glossy as it looks, you still can’t help it compare and judge yourself.

Moisturiser Love

Moisturiser  Love.

I love a good moisturiser! I’ve never been one to spend huge amounts of money on them thought, mainly because I cant afford / justify it!  I use Olay 7 Signs Sensitive Day cream , I love it! Its got SPF which we all know we need these days and goes on like a charm, it literally feels like I’ve put on some primer my skin feels that good and it keeps my otherwise oily skin nice and matt. Bonus.

But, this post is about a body moisturiser.  I’ve always liked the St Ives range, the apricot scrub (face or body!) are divine and leave your skin so smooth AND they are pretty pocket friendly as they last for ages! I digress, when I found out I was pregnant I naturally worried (amongst other things!) about stretch marks.

Now, I am prone to them, I have them on my thighs and my Mum has terrible ones from her 3 pregnancies so I knew I was likely to get a few but nevertheless I wanted to try my utmost to evade them anyway! So rather than splurge on the many many expensive formulas out there that I had seen recommended on various blogs etc, I thought I would use my vague knowledge of skin & stretch marks, and picked this St Ives Renewing Collagen Elastin.  My thinking behind this being the following – My skin is going to be stretched at quite a rapid rate so I need to be feeding it yummy collagen to keep it nice and supple…and it worked. So, I am slathering it on this time round too!

I looked on the St Ives website and it has actually been slated, but you know each to their own. It worked for me, the scent isn’t overpowering to my sensitive pregnant lady sense of smell, its goes on nice and smooth and is light non greasy which means I can get dressed / into bed pretty sharpish after applying. All major bonus points for me!

(also, I started putting it on my thighs and the buggers are fading, double whoop)

So, this is the first of my pregnancy product reviews.  I hope it helps someone out there, but rememberr stretch marks just happen there is no rhyme or reason, we vary wildly from person to person so don’t get mad at me if you still get them.  This is purely based on my experiences and therefore my opinions, and if you fancy trying it before splurging, go for it.

Mummy Stuff

So, I’m pregnant. Again.

It’s made me think back to when I was researching for ALL of the stuff I was going to need for this little bean I was growing

Busy busy busy.

Wow.
It’s been a loooong time since I last blogged.

Birth Story Part 2

So the morning of 13th dawned. We were up early I want to say 5am but I’m not sure. I know we had to be at the hospital for 6.30 so at 6.20 I bid my gorgeous dog goodbye and off we went. Both of us terrified and my Man so excited, me, I was just a big bag of nerves.

Birth Story.

My little girl is 8 Months old today. Wow. Where the hell has the time gone?! It’s that old cliche really, everyone says to you “Cherish the time, because it’ll go so quick, before you know it she’ll be walking”

Taken the night before I went in for my C-Section to get my naughty breech baby out!