SAHM Wardrobe

Skinny jeans. Remember when you could by a pair and not worry about the fact that your arse might pop out the top when you bent over because well you didn’t really bend over to reach things that much? And you didn’t have to worry about the material getting permanent knee marks in and then going baggy at the knee and everywhere else?!

Jewellery. Dangley earings that didn’t put you at risk of looking like Mike Tyson was an acquaintance because no-one even attempted to tug them out of your lobe? necklaces could be worn without threat of strangulation?!

My children would literally have sensory overload at this

Tops cut anywhere near your cleavage line. Nope, no one (in their right mind) is going to grab that and pull it down to reveal my barely filled bra.

Mamas, you get what I’m saying right? I am just about surviving my first summer (fashion wise) not breastfeeding and not pregnant, I can lived in shorts and t-shirts and the odd maxi here and there. Autumn and winter are not going to be my friend! Firstly does ANYONE (seriously now) know of a pair of reasonably priced (being the key word here, we have two children and one income supporting us and quite enough debt to be getting on with already thank you kindly)skinny jeans that don’t sag after one wash / one play group / playdate?! I love skinny jeans, I however cannot get on with leggings the reason being is I am blessed which I mean sincerely a large arse, I like it leggings don’t. FACT. And yes, I know they should be a staple of my wardrobe with a long length t-shirt etc but as well as being large of arse I am tall which means something that is long line on you will be regular non arse and non camel toe covering to me, and for that reason me and leggings will never be fashion friends…I do not feel comfortable with it all out there. So I need jean finding help.

Palazzo Pants – Will I ever have a reason to wear you?!

Actually I generally need some wardrobe staples advice, practical (yes yes I know that word lends vision of frumpy not fashion forward but I intend to be crawling, jumping, running, baking, cleaning and no doubt having food smushed into it as some point during each and every day) functional but fashionable, not pretty as that just ain’t me!

My shape, like all of us post baby has changed, and I am not referring to weight here but my body shape has actually changed, things I used to adore to wear just don’t look right anymore but unlike my pre child days I rarely have the time / chance to go clothes shopping and trying them on is just ridiculous, one change room, one mummy and one double pushchair is not a fun equation and it’s not that my kids are well behaved it’s the fact that unless there is a disable change room (few and far between round me, which is bad for me but worse for people with a disability, come on equality peeps get on it their need is slightly more imperative than mine) it basically means I block the aisle / hall with my pushchair nad then have to get down to my skivvies with the curtain either open or draped precariously round the pushchair which then obviously elicits the best game of peek a boo my children have ever had, cue raucous laughter and a lack of concentrating from me. Fun. So yeh, I could internet shop but then if it doesn’t fit I have to return it which means a trip to my local post office which is tiny, not pushchair friendly meaning I have to go in with a child in each hand / arm leaving my gob for the package I need to return…goodbye teeth.

I guess this look is what I have in my head it’s having the time and money to shop for it.

Mummy readers and Tall chiccas if you are out there, help. Best skinny jeans and mummy wardrobe basics recommendations at the ready please…I neeeed to get my identity back now I am no longer preggers and no longer an office worker what’s your day-to-day element proof uniform?  It’s funny, before children I never put that much thought into my wardrobe or thought as my clothes as giving me and identity, since becoming a Mum it’s like I need something, just one thing that reminds me who I was before I became the nappy changing, puke cleaning, toy tidying play machine…and having my name!!!

“Parenting”

I had seen a lot of buzz recently about this book ‘French Children Don’t Throw Food‘ and thought I would give it a read.  Don’t get me wrong, my children aren’t angels to any degree but one thing I can always rely on is their appetite, Bean has loved food from her first taste of butternut puree and Bites although a little hesitant to start never fails to amaze me at what and how much she can put away bearing in mind she has NO teeth…9 months old and nada.

Anyway, I digress (as usual!) as I said Bean has always loved food and I can hands down say I have never cooked anything that she wouldn’t eat, the stronger the flavour the better in all honesty. Cue our family trip to South Africa earlier this you to introduce the girls to the rest of the family, and suddenly getting her to eat became a Task, rather than something that just happened naturally, and it was every meal, obviously we were worried she was ill to start with and also worried about her waking up or generally just starving but she maintained the eating little routine for the entire 3 weeks, bar a 3 helping round of Jamie Oliver’s pregnant Jools Pasta, a somewhat staple in this house that thankfully my FIL also loved to make. At first we tried to bribe and coerce her into eating but after 2 days I decide to let her run with it, going by the thinking that if and when she was hungry she will eat…which she did albeit it sporadically but also random non meals.

She loves brown sauce SO much

My husband was beside himself, I was trying not to let it bother me too much but it did you can’t help but worry at such a drastic change in your child’s behavour. I am still not 100% as to what bought it on, the heat, the constant stimulation (cousins running round and TV on 24/7) or perhaps it was just the only thing she could control when everything as she knew it had changed – she was sleeping in a room by herself that she had never seen before and in a double bed and she was as good as gold so for that we thanked our stars…I think sleeping randomly trumps eating randomly I could not have coped with anymore interrupted sleep at that point especially as her sister was still waking for a night feed or two.

However, upon returning home she was back to her old ways, thankfully. But more recently it has become a battle at meals times, how much of it is my own making I’m not sure – my girls go to bed earlyish Bites @ 6.05 and Bean after the night garden (which I record incase its a bad day and she goes to bed earlier @ 6.20) so my evening schedule is a bit rushed, Bites eats no later than 4.30 as a general rule but that is too early for Bean but most days she wants to eat then with her sister and I am not joking it is SUCH a process, we can easily spend an hour at the table as she chats and faffs her way thought the meal, asking me to feed her when she is more than capable or wanting to sit on my lap and I know the reason is because I am feeding her sister so obviously she is getting less attention from me, but I can’t wait to give Bean her dinner when her sister is in bed it’s just too late (they are early risers so late bedtime means she would still wake the same time and be grumpy all day, not my idea of fun) so in the end I have to cut her meal time short and get them in the bath…but I can’t help but worry that she is not eating enough. I have cut out her afternoon snacks to make sure she is hungry enough to eat in a more concentrated manner althewhile I have this niggly feeling that really she still needs her afternoon snack as toddlers calorific needs are so great and she is always busy busy busy.

The other thing is potty training…she got it so quickly and so well I was flabbergasted and then 10 days a go poo-gate began. No telling me she needed to go even if I asked her and then just doing it, in her knickers, on the floor…it is driving me crazy we even had a poo painted bed (it was nap time to be fair to her and it leaked out the top of the pull up so she was obviously intrigued and touched it) but I am at a loss for how to deal with it – the shouting hasn’t worked, neither has telling the poo off(!) and asking her all the time just gets her (understandably) irate.

So, I am giving this book a go to see if the French have insights to offer on the matter, it’s my first foray into parenting books / advice I’ve always trusted my gut and when really panicked looked to the best known parenting sites on the web – NM & MN and I think that was pretty much in the breastfeeding days anyway…

But, dear reader if you have any advice or amazing resource I should know about please please share..or just let me know I’m not alone. (or have you read the book – what did you think?)

Pregnancy…reality check

Yep, that’s right I need to write myself a slight reality check.

 

 

I LOVED being pregnant, after the initial morning sickness / nausea’s feelings passed it was just the most amazing experience of my life.  Growing a person, 10 toes, 10 fingers…you know the drill but when you think, and I mean really think about it for 9 months out babies grew (like little parasites I was once heard to say) from cells to tiny beings, their hearts beating inside us.  Just amazing, and I don’t care how corny it sounds it truly is a miraculous and incredible experience.

However, to stop me getting broody (or just help to remove those rose-tinted glasses) and inspired by the wonderful Hannah @ make, Do and push! who wrote this wonderful post I am writing a list of things that did really annoy me about being knocked up!

1. Booze. Or lack there of…in summer it means no large glass of chilled wine or no huge jug of pimms and a straw. Winter, no full and ripe red wines, mulled wine or copious amounts of bubbly come the festive season. Also means no beer (or five) with a curry or mexican.  Obviously you can partake in the odd glass, but me I wasn’t willing to risk it. Meaning after what feels like being pregnant forever means my hard earned drinking abilities are gone, and I’m left tipsy or with a headache after just half a beer or glass of wine. Gah.
2. Designated driver. Yep, because of above. Thanks. Again.
3. Cheese!! Amongst other things, yes pate and Rare steaks I’m talking about you. Never before have I craved pate or stinky moldy cheese so much.  Luckily I moaned so much about it when I was preggers I was lucky enough to receive copious amounts of both…yaye!
4. Maintenance. Ok, not for the first few months but by the time 6/7 months comes around unless you have a well behaved (!) other half bye toenails see you when the baby is, hmmmm 1 year old and I have some time  to paint you.  And the lady garden…seriously neglected, again unless you TRUST your other half to behave it’s kind of a no go (self maintenance wise anyway) I did have an immac related disasster…but we won’t go there 😉
5. Maternity Clothes. Er highstreet…sort it out. Please. I loved ASOS’s maternity range but found the highstreet sorely lacking and all that was there was majorly overpriced in my opinion.  That and the fact that I’m tall really made shopping fun.
6. Sense of smell / taste. Mine went into overdrive, things that I normally loved made me have severe gag reflex and near vomiting experiences, for example; Rotisseri chickens in supermarkets, generally a good smell, first pregnancy I couldn’t go anywhere near the part of the shop with them in without dry heaving, no joke, my Mum found this hilarious when shopping with me. Second time round it was mushrooms. Yep, seriously just the though of them had me yacking, couldn’t go near them in the veg aisle, wouldn’t have them in the house and if my long suffering husband even suggested them for dinner I would heave in his face (involuntarily I might add!! Why? No idea and neither of them bother me now at all. (thankfully)
7. Cuddles. Or lack there of, again this is a 3rd trimester thing but I was so all out front with both of mine that cuddles were a no go, even with Bean!!!
8. Sleep. Pregnancy insomnia. CHECK. Leg cramps whilst sleeping. CHECK. Needing to pee 45 billion times a night. CHECK. Not being able to get comfy. CHECK. I love to lie on my tummy to sleep, obviously with one in the oven, that ain’t happening, so my nighttime fidgets got worse and worse. On several occasions I made my hubby sleep at the bottom of our bed instead of the top as I was adamant it was more comfortable. (like I said, long suffering!!)
9. Chivalry. And no, I’m not talking about giving up seats, I mean the well meaning people who think pregnancy is some kind of illness leaving you incapable of many of life’s day to day going’s on.  I may sound a little rude, but as someone who is ridiculously independent this did not go down well with me. No pleasing some people.
10. Baby Movements. WAIT, don’t shoot me yet. Yes, the majority of them I loved but the ones where it looked like my precious passenger was trying to escape via my belly button…not so much. Alien like to say the least.
11. Hormones. Specifically making me cry.  Before I knew I was pregnant second time round I could not stop crying at the news Whitney Houston had passed away, don’t get me wrong she was a very talented lady but I never knew I liked her that much, I am serious when I say I could not stop crying it was awful…and then I found out I was pregnant, now I get it!
12. And the brucey bonus…My belly button. I have an outy, so as you are no doubt aware pregnancy made it a literal button for the world to see, didn’t bother me in the least (amused me greatly if I am perfectly honest) but when people tried to push it!!! No no no no no. 10 times worse than random people touching your belly. ewww.

There won’t be a corresponding things I loved post because there were hundreds of them and I would be pregnant again in no time.

Thoughts for today

Well, I have just got stuck in a size 10 pair of maternity skinny jeans. Thanks universe for that.

Please can the weather sort itself out, I need to be back in flip flops ASAP. I want to wear my wedding slops that I never got round to wearing on w-day.

That is all.

Working Girl

Why do we (women, sorry for the generalisations but I’m going on experiences here) struggle to be pleased for each other when things are going well?

I went into work for the day last week and was chuffed to find a colleague had been given a new role in the company – a much, much needed organisation type role and she literally could not be more perfect for the position. Finally I thought to myself, thinking everyone would think the same.

Wrong.

She’s rubbing it in my face

She asked for a title, wouldn’t do it without one

Doing my head in talking about it all the time

Jealousy? Bitterness? I don’t know, I was just so dissapoined, especially as I had been in a similar situation a few years back when I was the only women ever on a male dominated firm/industry to get such a decent promotion & perks package…were my other girlie collegues happy for me? Were they fuck.

I knew you were liked, I didn’t realise howmuch

errm, actually I’m just pretty dammed awesome at my job, but thanks for the cynicism muchly appreciated.

And it happens all the time. I want my daughter to grow up and know that she can achieve anything she sets her mind to and that I will be with her and supporting her 110%, but I’m just going to be her Mum.

It’s bad enough that women are still on a different pay scale to men, but when we can’t even support each other how can we really moan about this, we need to believe in each other completely and the and only then will everything else follow.